A bass died and went to Heaven (where all basses go when they pass on). St. Peter greeted him at the gate and asked, “Sir, how many false notes did you sing in your life?”
The bass answered, “Three.”
“Three times!” said St. Peter.
Out came another angel and stuck the bass three times with a needle.
“Ow! What was that for?” asked the bass, while rubbing his arm.
St. Peter explained, “Here in heaven, we stick singers once for each false note they sang down on Earth.”
“Oh,” said the bass, and he was just about to step through the gates when suddenly he heard a horrible scream come from behind a closed door. “Oh my goodness, what was that?” asked the bass, horrified.
“Oh,” said St. Peter, “that’s a tenor who arrived a while ago. He’s just about to start his third week in the sewing machine.”